By: Melanie Redd
What do the men in our lives really need to hear from us?
What can a woman say to the man in her life to make him feel GREAT?
Are there some awesome words and phrases she can use?
Absolutely!
I asked my husband to share with me his answers to these same questions.
He immediately gave me a list of 5 things he loves to hear and would love to hear more often.
I had to write as fast as I could write to keep up with him. Within 10 minutes, I had an incredible list!
And, so, I offer you the wisdom of this great man I’ve lived with for almost 26 years now.
Here are 5 Ways to Affirm Your Man:
1. I Respect you!
“As a man, as a person, as a dad, as a husband, as you are – I respect and admire you. Even after all of these years, I still respect you.”
“So again I say, each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.” Ephesians 5:33
Women need love. Men need respect.
Here are some practical ways to communicate respect to your man:
- Ask his opinion and listen to what he has to say.
- Respond without arguing with him.
- Don’t put him down to your friends.
- Don’t belittle or make fun of him in public.
- Or belittle or make fun of him in front of the kids.
- If you disagree, try to still treat him with consideration.
- Speak highly of him to friends and family.
2. I Appreciate you!
“I appreciate you and who you are as a man of integrity. Am so grateful for who you are. I am thankful that I am your wife.”
Here are some practical ways to communicate appreciation to your man:
Come up with 3-4 things you really appreciate about your man.
- Sense of humor
- His Compassionate way of dealing with people
- Honesty
- His Wisdom
- His Intelligence, or
- Strength
Tell him at least one of these attributes that you appreciate.
3. I appreciate what you do!
“I am thankful for all that you do for us – for working hard, for giving your best, and for providing for us as you do. Men really like to be appreciated. It means a great deal to us.”
Here are some practical ways to communicate appreciation for what your man does:
- Use your words and thank him.
- Make a big deal in front of the kids for something he did.
- Brag to his friends and your friends over something he did.
- Give him a big hug and whisper your gratitude to him.
4. I love you!
“We like to hear it too. We like to know that you love us!”
Here are some practical ways to communicate love to your man:
- Give him lots of hugs and kisses.
- Send him a nice note, card, email or text message.
- Buy him a little gift that he will really enjoy.
- Do some kind act of service for him – wash his car, make his favorite meal.
- Spend time with him doing what he loves to do – go to a ballgame or an action movie with him.
5. I Think You Are the Best, and I Would Choose You if I had it to do All Over Again!
“I’m really glad that I picked you. You are the best one, and I would pick you again.“
Here are some practical ways to communicate to him that he is still the best one to you:
(This one really makes me think of some old songs. Maybe you can use one of these titles to communicate your love).
- “We’re still having fun, and you’re still the ONE.”
- “You’re the ONE that I want.”
- “I can’t stop loving YOU.”
- “I will always love YOU.”
Many years ago, I was water skiing with two of my best friends. My dad was driving us around the lake on a gorgeous summer day.
At one point we stopped to rest and have a snack. As we paused, my dad started talking to us about boys.
We were all single at the time.
My dad teased us a little, and then he asked a very serious question:
“Isn’t there some guy out there that you girls RESPECT?”
I don’t know who my friends pictured when he posed the question. But, when my dad asked that question, I immediately thought of Randy. Randy was a single guy at our church who I thought very highly of.
Not long after that boat trip, all three of us girls were engaged; all of us married men that we really respected within a year of that day at the lake. And, we are all still married to those same good men—after 25 years.
My man just happens to be named “Randy!”
So, what do you think? What would you add to my list? What does your man like to hear?
I always enjoy hearing from you!
Wow if someone would’ve asked me who i respected it would be my husband too. He was the most mature of all the youth. Really into the Word and served God with a passion in everything. He has always put others before himself and when he saw a need, he would provided a solution or at least find a way to help. He had few friends because most viewed him as too religious. But all he did was express love to God. We never thought we’d end up together but what started as a very close friendship, ended up at the altar. He is an amazing father, a fantastic husband, and I love him with all my heart. He isn’t perfect, but I have way more good days than bad with him. There is never a day he won’t make me smile or even laugh until I snort. He is a hard worker and I couldn’t of asked God for a better husband. Sorry I just had to let it all out. Sometimes we don’t realize what we have at our sides, but today you opened my eyes. Thank you! God bless!
This is beautiful! I love those moments when God opens our eyes even more to what He has blessed us with. Not that we don’t know we are blessed but there is just something special when God shows us how deep He answered our prayers for a godly spouse!
God truly does know what’s best. We just need to keep trusting that His will is perfect and that He wants nothing but the best for us.
Hello Melanie.. Thank you for the wonderful post with lots of tips to encourage husbands.. But sometimes I feel we ought to be the helper too if he fails in his fellowship with Christ.. Sometimes I feel we need to correct him ..Is there any better way to work this out?
Sara, the best way for this is leading by example. Yes, our husbands our the leaders in our home but we as wives can lead by example by the way we speak, react, and especially how we serve God, with or without our husbands. Our spouses watch and receive the benefit of our salvation more than we know. Even with my husband serving God and as a man that strives to be in Christ everyday, I still minister to him through acts and vice versus, he ministers to me. Hope this helps!
I love that you separated the I appreciate YOU and I appreciate WHAT you do! Sometimes we can mix them up but it’s never a bad thing. I just seriously love how they’re separated in this post!