Why you should be Encouraging your Spouse

The most read posts on this blog are focused on Encouraging your Spouse and/or Marriage.

Encouraging your spouse is a need and desire we can all agree that is needed.

67 Encouraging things to say to your Husband

15 Encouraging Scriptures to text your Husband

40 Date ideas for Married Couples to try

Marriage can be hard and when a struggle comes in, it feels like an unpredictable storm. Just like we would crave shelter and comfort in a storm, we crave encouragement, safety, and unity in our messy marriages. Because just like what we know what a storm can do to a home physically, we recognize what can happen to a marriage that is without hope and encouragement. It can all be destroyed.

The unfortunate thing is that we may not know we need encouragement till we are almost out of it but by then it can be a dangerous spot for yourself, your spouse, and for the entirety of your marriage. Thankfully by recognizing the needs and choosing to be proactive daily, we can change the center of our marriage.

So, for this reason I am so happy you are choosing to read this and learn about encouraging your spouse.

There are many reasons why we should choose to encourage our spouses daily but here are the three top reasons in my experience, why we should be diligent and proactive to encourage our spouses.

Encouragement to our Spouses eliminates other voices into their ears to their hearts.

I think this post from Fierce Marriage on the Importance of Encouraging Words is probably the best way to explain why this reason is so important to be diligent in encouraging our spouse, even as Christians.

My husband tells me often, he fears (reverence) the Lord and would never do anything to harm our marriage. He knows it was God that put us together and he would never want to go against God’s alignment. I absolutely love that he affirms that in our marriage and has faith in that, but the truth is, we are all still human. We feel what we cannot always help to feel or think on things that we should not. (Which is why there is so many scriptures on the mind and thoughts) But when we are in a healthy relationship that is encouraged to listen to one another, express feelings to another, and be able to trust in each other, we allow a marriage that can speak and talk on situations like this one is the post referred above to continue to keep things healthy.

Encouragement in Marriage keeps a positive outlook on Marriage.

This goes hand in hand in what I had just mentioned above but we do not want to keep a positive outlook for just in case moments of enticing thoughts or actions. Keeping a positive outlook in our marriage is actually very good for both spouses’ mental health and emotional health.

Wouldn’t we all want to be happy daily? To wake up, be confident, healthy minded, and feel secure. Well, as a married adult, we partake in our spouse’s happiness, positivity, and mental health. Let’s encourage our marriage by being an encouragement to one another. Give to our spouses that embraces support and joy in our lives.

A Encouraging (Unifying) Marriage is the way God designed it.

I don’t know about you, but I love the vision of God taking a rib from man to create woman. The bible tells us that God took a rib and brought woman to man then they became one flesh. (Genesis 2:18-23) God designed us women for a glorious reason. Though I may not always remember it in my day to day as a wife or fully understand God’s concept of it; I trust in it and believe it that we women complete our man. We are his missing piece when we are not united as one flesh.

We will never feel completed if we do not follow the design of God for our lives which is to be one. Being one with one another is encouragement, trust, edification, and complete unity.

Examples of encouraging your spouse may consist of:

Most of us receive encouragement in the form of affirmation.

This can be speaking to your spouse in person or sending a text out for the sole purpose of making their day better. Whether a text or telling them, make it to build them up. Be flirtatious, give a compliment, give support; it will bring a smile to their face.

Some spouses are encouraged in the marriage by acts of service because it gives them joy to see that someone who loves them wants to do things with them or for them. Though this is a very common love language for men, it is important to learn your spouse’s love language.

Acts of service can include helping them out in the yard, making their favorite dinner, buying their favorite snacks, running errands for them without them asking. Pretty much anything that is physically helping them in their day to day. The act of service is to deliberately do for them with a willing heart.

I have nothing in common with my husband when it comes to movies and tv shows but he knows I will still watch them with him just to spend quality time with him, which makes him happy. Another favorite of his is me out in the yard with him. I used to not like it but now it’s quite refreshing.

And of course, affection goes a long way in encouraging your marriage.

Affection is the one thing we can only do with our spouses. If we are not consistently being affectionate with each other, it can be detrimental to our marriage. Lack of affection can discourage us from fighting for our marriage, building our marriage, and keeping a strong marriage. We are supposed to trust we not only love each other but we find each other attractive, we desire each other, we are tender towards each other even in hard times and affection can truly soothe our emotions, build up our emotions and comfort us.

Be affectionate even if it’s hard. It is hard for my husband. Before marriage he was never an affectionate person but he has learned over the years, it helps us progress in our marriage because it gives us a sense of security in one another. Affection is a beautiful way to express love in a marriage which definitely partakes in encouraging a healthy marriage.